Theft Suspect Apprehended in a Recent String of Burglaries


This cute adorable 5 year old was apprehended in connection of various thefts in the area

After a raid of her room the following was found:

An old lady’s purse with the contents dumped out in her closet. Nail polish, scissors and nail clippers were also found on the scene. 

A follow up raid of her work establishment found a sight word folder which was reported by a fellow coworker (and reading competitor) to be missing for days. 

Still missing is a military dependency ID which was not found on either premises.. The suspect refuses to comment on the whereabouts of this item

The suspect pleads innocence on all counts. 


Her lawyer released the following statement in regards to these accusations:

“She’s just a kid. It happens” 

Trial will commence this weekend with Judge Mommy presiding. If found guilty this five year old could see up to one day of grounding for each count with no chance of parole. 


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