The Football Coach

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I’ve seen 6 football games, watched my son train these few months….

I’m gunna declare myself an expert at this point.

I’ve learned that men that coach all have a specific style.

There’s “Always Amped Up on Monster Energy Man (I assume it’s  Monster.. could be anything with a stimulant) He’s always shouting, and when he chastises and praises it’s the same shouting tone.. So the players can’t really tell if they’re being yelled at or doing something right…

There’s super chill everything is going to be OK coaches. The ones who only yell to get your attention and usually stand back and impart their wisdom to the kids one on one.

There’s the bi-polar coaches. The ones that exude inspiration and energy.. until a kid does something wrong and then like a flip of the switch things get scary and loud real quick <~ these of all should not be teaching little kids.. and I’m REALLY glad this variety is not found in my son’s set of coaches…

One thing they have in common… it’s their LIFE. And you can see that energy being passed onto the kids..

They  have this chant at the end… Witchy 101 would use this chant to show the power infused into basic words. Its incantation has put a spell on these boys… They actually LIKE getting hit and taken down in tackles. They LOVE the idea of getting the ball and therefore being the target of a bunch of kids wanting to cream you…

They willingly come back for more…..

My friends… I dare say I enrolled my son in a cult.

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4 thoughts on “The Football Coach

  1. Yikes! I haven’t experienced this since my boys don’t play football, but they sure do look cute in their little uniforms and helmets!!! Soccer coaches seem more like regular Dads who got accidentally suckered into volunteering. Haha.

    1. I don’t know what it is about football…we used to have 4 coaches for each division… then after a week or two a bunch of dads have been down there as well so there’s at least 7-8 now… the men love it! Meanwhile I’m up on a hill freezing my buns off…. lol

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